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Behold! The New Trainer Dogs! (Transcript)
NOTE: DO NOT BE CONFUSED IF TV IS SHOWN IN THIS EPISODE. PATRICK BROUGHT ELECTRICITY TO SWISS CITY IN "BEHOLD! THE CAKE OF WISDOM!" *(The "Previously" screen shows scenes from "Behold! The Spongy Demon Dog!") *(Theme plays) *(The episode starts at SpongeBob's tent. He is watching TV, with several lottery numbers on his sofa.) *'TV Announcer: '''And now, it's "The Swiss Lottery!" *'SpongeBob: 'Why am I watching this? I never win. *'TV Announcer: 'Sponsored by Justin Bieber! *(Justin Bieber comes on to SpongeBob's TV screen and SpongeBob reaches for the remote) *'SpongeBob: 'CELEBRITIES... RUIN... EVERYTHING!!!! (He switches the channel to STV, Swiss City's one-stop music channel) Hey, where's the bra gone? *(A title card appears saying "Two Hours Later") *(SpongeBob switches back to the lottery) *'TV Announcer: 'And the winning numbers are.... *(Patrick comes into SpongeBob's tent) *'SpongeBob: 'What the hell? You're not meant to be here! *'Patrick: 'Yes, I am. (checks hand-drawn compass) Looks like South to me! And Sensei's got an important (incessant gibberish) *(SpongeBob walks up to Patrick) *'SpongeBob: 'Slow down! *'Patrick: 'Sensei's got an important announcement! Come to the training base. *'SpongeBob: 'You do realize I could have won a million dollars without you butting in? *'Patrick: 'Does this look like I realize anything to you? (close-up on a disturbing Patrick face) *'SpongeBob: 'GAH!!! (runs to training base. Sign on the right of base says "DISTURBED SPONGES WELCOME") *(SpongeBob walks in on a large crowd.) *'SpongeBob: 'What's going on? *'Frugrum: 'We don't know yet! (The crowd run closer to the stage, crushing him to death in the process. He is shown as a squashed pancake afterwards.) *'Sensei: 'And the event I've brought you to see... the event that will change night walks in Swiss City forever... The event that - *'Little Kid: 'HOOPLA! *'Sensei: 'Oh, won't you please SHUT UP? The event that is.... druMr.oll please.... (Everyone bangs their knees)... the new trainer dogs! *'Zorg: 'Woopity-doop! *'Patrick: 'What's a dog? *'Unnamed Pirate #3: 'Arrrr, they be scurvy seadogs. *'SpongeBob: 'We're gonna get a dog! We're gonna get a dog! But I still don't know what dog means. But, we're gonna get a dog! *'Sensei: 'For those you nuts who don't know what a dog is... DON'T YOU EVER WATCH THE TV SHOW "ABOVE LIFE"? And for those of you dumb-ass nuts who don't watch that... HERE'S A DOG! (He holds up a brown Labrador puppy) *'Everyone (in unison) 'Awwwww.... *'Sensei: 'Dogs aren't all fun and games, you know. I could put pictures of dog attacks up on the slideshows if you want. *'Evelyn: 'Dogs can attack? *'Sensei: 'JUST TAKE THE DOGS!!! (He faints, releasing many dogs. SpongeBob picks up a brown Poodle.) *'SpongeBob: 'Isn't it a bit cruel putting a dog in water? *(Sensei wakes up) *'Sensei: 'That's what they said about Sandy. Put these on your dogs - (He holds up a few small water helmets) - and they'll be fine. *'Patrick: 'Cool! Like mini-Sandys! (He tries to squeeze one on his head) AAAAUUUGH!! MY SKULL! (We hear a cracking sound and Patrick takes the helmet off and is shown with a purple forehead.) You have it, dog. (He puts it on the dog, luckily. The dog is shown barely holding its breath a second before.) *(The next scene cuts to the shop "WetPets".) *'Sandy: 'Wait a freaking second. There aren't any dog products here. *'Sword: 'There are products made of dogs - *'Sandy: 'QUIET, YOU. *'Patrick: 'Turn around! *'Sandy: 'Okay, but I'm not trusting a dumb pink starfish like you all the time. (turns around) DOG PRODUCTS! (We see a shelf saying "NEW DOG FOOD! FOR DOGS." All the Swiss City citizens run to the shelf and we see a montage of them buying many dog food brands, such as "Hard Bone ®", "Give the Dog a Bone!", "Sir Chewalot" and "Doggg!!! ™" *'SpongeBob: 'These dogs are gonna enjoy tonight. (They leave the shop) *'Patrick: '''Did you notice the name of that shop...'WetPets'? Hee hee...that sounds wrong. Category:Transcripts